the good-bye i thought i would never hear
today something happend i never thought would....brian brock up with me. i dont know what to do. the only thing i had faith in. the only person i really trusted. i dont know what i did. he got shandy to brake up with me. couldnt he do it himself. he didnt even tell me why. i love him so much. he said that he would never do anything to hurt me. well this hurts like hell. he also said "i love you forever and always i promise" well forever and always was really short. i didnt even see it coming. last night he said he loved me. i wish i could go back and make him love me. i wish he cared. i am left with this brocken empty felling were he is suppose to be. i have never loved anyone before now that i have i am not sure i really ever wanna love someone again. you know what they say its better to love and lost then to never love at all. welll i defnitly lost. i belived him when he said he loved me. i must be the stupidest person on the face of the earth. i still love him. i still want him. why didnt he just love me to. i am crying so hard and have been since lunch. so much for my happy ending. this hurts so bad. i wish i never loved him at all. well maybe not i sure would have missed alot. he is the first person i really liked. now its over. the one person i loved with all my heart dont love me. i wanna know why. i should get that much just tell me why. i dont care if you dont wanna talk about i do. i wanna know why what did i do. i need you. i feel brocken. i am usless now. you know what they do to things that get brocken....they throw them away. thats just what brian did. threw me away. i am sorry im not perfict but i tryed so hard for him. this pain will never end. i am glad i didnt know the way it would end cuz i know i would have never went out with him. someone cure this pain. it wont go away. i tryed so hard. i want brian!!!! i want him to love me agian. like he use to.

a thousend words wont bring you back

i know because i tryed.

neither will a thousand tears

i know because i cryed.

i wish i could make him come back to me. my heart is so brocken. i have never felt like this before. someone please help me. i need somone in my life. no one will ever take brians place. i know. i guess they call them first love's for a reason huh. my worst fear just came true. now i am alone with no one. he always said we were gonna git married and live together. what a lier.

i gotta go.

m.wilson

<< 2004-08-27 @ 6:35 p.m.> >>

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Wearing:red silo shirt & blue jeanes
Drinking:sweet tea
Eating:nothin
Thinking:about the past
Talking to:Kari
Felling:sad
Linking:http://holdmeimcute.diaryland.com
Play List
>>Undistcoverd-Ashlee Simpson
>>my best friend-Tim McGraw
>>My Immortal-Evensence
>>Broken-Amy Lee
>>Over & Over-Tim McGraw & Nelly
>>fall to pieces-Avril Lavign
>>bless the broken road-rascal flatts
Bio
my full name is Mika-Mae Wilson. but my friends call me Mika-Mae. im a 15 year old living in Durant.I have green eyes and brown hair w/ blond highlights, my friends say I look like my aunt Kandy.
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